beautiful, isnt it
Sunday, March 12, 2017
Ate at Japan rail cafe today with mum and leng.. treated them :) missing dad and sis and xuan, and ger.. it was good, very nice, peaceful.. maybe I really should do emed, will have more time in life to live a little. Even the day-times spent alone might be great watching shows and movies, playing games or reading a book or learning Japanese..

As usual dread booking in, dread being away from my life and my loved ones.. but this time there's an additional anticipation feeling, because by this time next week the worst of mocc should be over ba. Sigh..
at 2:56 PM
Tuesday, March 07, 2017
"But I cannot lie to myself and say that National Service is not needed – the reason being these places I love, which house the many people I love, need to be protected. These things I love such as peace, harmony, security, and everything beautiful and good we have in our lives, need to be defended and held on closely to."
at 5:57 PM
at 12:51 AM
Sunday, January 29, 2017
1. Desiderata Poem - Max Ehrmann

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence. 
As far as possible, without surrender, 
be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others,
even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious
to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter, for always
there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble;
it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself.
You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.
Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive Him to be.

And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul.
With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

2. The Appointment in Samarra
(as retold by W. Somerset Maugham)

The speaker is Death

There was a merchant in Bagdad who sent his servant to market to buy provisions and in a little while the servant came back, white and trembling, and said, Master, just now when I was in the marketplace I was jostled by a woman in the crowd and when I turned I saw it was Death that jostled me.  She looked at me and made a threatening gesture,  now, lend me your horse, and I will ride away from this city and avoid my fate.  I will go to Samarra and there Death will not find me.  The merchant lent him his horse, and the servant mounted it, and he dug his spurs in its flanks and as fast as the horse could gallop he went.  Then the merchant went down to the marketplace and he saw me standing in the crowd and he came to me and said, Why did you make a threating getsture to my servant when you saw him this morning?  That was not a threatening gesture, I said, it was only a start of surprise.  I was astonished to see him in Bagdad, for I had an appointment with him tonight in Samarra.
at 3:19 PM
Saturday, December 31, 2016
I must go where the brave men die yah.
at 3:58 PM
Sunday, December 25, 2016
Keeping essential services running on a god forsaken Christmas Day.
at 1:49 PM
Monday, November 28, 2016
I gave up buying my sofa today for this. Actually, I gave up all my meals today and probably the respect of all my colleagues who don't understand the situation fully, nor the steps my brain mapped out to prevent any fails in my safety net (isn't that why it's called a safety net?). It sounds like the right thing to do, giving up a sofa, but I just wonder, if anyone else would actually do the same.
at 11:44 PM
I can only hope I made a difference to 1, 2, or maybe 3 ppl today. I can only hope.
at 11:26 PM
Wednesday, November 02, 2016
So much dread.. for work and for on call.. only able to look forward to, if at all, to the end of call. When will I get to love the moment I'm living? Just all I'm asking for.
at 2:23 PM
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
Felt OK abt being HD MO ytd. In fact felt better than quite a few of the days back in team. Was quite geared up, but dno why this morning just so dreary. Must be cos I'm tired. But I don't get it, the more I sleep towards 6h a day the more tired I get daily. Wtf.

Anw, I think it's not too bad. Or at least I should tell myself it's not too bad. Just handle changes and pts as they come. Can one.
at 8:04 AM